a canonical compendium of repulsive recipes

1.31.2006

Fried Guinea Pig

I realize that the idea of a truly repulsive recipe has certain prejudiced elements to it. Having never actually tried haggis, for example, I assume its repulsiveness based on a certain cultural bias I possess against eating stomachs. So there’s definitely an element of xenophobia inherent to the grossness of a lot of the grosser recipes out there. I'm all for cultural awareness and everything, but that being said, eating pets? Ew ew gross. Courtesy of Laurel, who has traveled extensively through the sorts of countries that, in my more drunken moments, I offensively mock, I'm excited to bring you this simple yet delicious confection.

Laurel confirms that this dish is quite popular in, like, Peru or something. I think the key element is the cold beer that it is suggested you have on hand, because you will have to hit yourself in the head with the can or bottle several times until you are dissociated enough from reality to eat a freaking guinea pig.
Juan Fajardo’s Fried Guinea Pig
(Cuy Chaqtado)

1 guinea pig, de-haired, gutted, and cleaned (ed: you’re on your own here. I have no idea how to de-hair a guinea pig. Though my vintage edition of the Gourmet Cookbook has a section on how to flay a squirrel)
1/2 c. flour
1/4 - 1/2 t. ground cumin
salt and black pepper to taste
1/2 c. oil

Pat dry the skin of the guinea pig and rub in the cumin, salt, and pepper. Preheat oil. Dust the carcass (ed: yum! Nothing is as appetizing as the word “carcass”) with the flour and place it on its back in the oil, turning to cook both sides. Alternately, the guinea pig can be cut and fried in quarters.

Serve with boiled potato or boiled manioc root, and a salad of cut tomatoes and slivered onions bathed in lime juice and a bit of salt. Have cold beer on hand.

If you're curious as to what this dish will look like before it's cooked, here's an example:
And if you're interested in the after:
Yummy.

37 Comments:

Blogger Leila said...

Guinea pigs are so bitey and mean. I bet they taste gross.

5:15 PM, January 31, 2006

 
Anonymous krotka said...

fuck you fuck you fuck you!!!!!
I hope you will end like that!!!!!!

7:36 PM, August 06, 2006

 
Anonymous Gonzalo said...

Dear Helen...that's what "variety of cultures" consist of...this dish comes from inkas' tradition...and i understand that it might be awful for some people like you...because in your society you have known Guinea pig as a pet.

some people might think that for example scottish typical dressing is awful because they wear skirts so that they seem gays...but that is their tradition!! let me tell you something I am living in Australia and i have found out that they eat kangaroo meat!!!...so come on open your mind and don't judge people because of their traditions!

10:31 AM, August 13, 2006

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

GUINEA PIGS ARE NOT BITEY AND MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SCREW YOU AND I HOPE YOU BURN TO DEATH

10:43 PM, August 15, 2006

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it is just NOT right to cook dogs...or any other animal... especially pets!!!!! you people are WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! why do you even have a museum for this????

10:45 PM, August 15, 2006

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you sick fuck! burn in hell with your mother and father while you children are hung from poles with a sign reading: "Feel free to throw rocks at the fags"

12:33 AM, August 16, 2006

 
Blogger Emma (D) said...

wow-you people seem to have a lot of aggression you need to work out. Gonzalo: tradition is OK-as long as no-one is hurt by it! I find hot dogs nearly as repulsive, but as the owner of three guinea pigs, it's hard for me to imagine eating these furry little animals. But it is just as hard to imagine eating a cow, pig, or chicken. The difference between a kilt and fried guinea pigs is that no-one is any the worse for wearing a kilt-(except for maybe the sheep, who possibly got nipped by the razor when being shorn) and when frying guinea pigs you have to kill the pig. Not OK!
By the way, Inca is spelled with a 'c', not a 'k'.

9:19 AM, August 18, 2006

 
Anonymous Gonzalo said...

well it is good to know that there are still people with civilized manners of giving opinions.

Yes Emma..but i don't know if it might be harder (i don't pretend to make a top ten) than killing bulls in a bullfight, hunting whales for making sushies, taking out fox's skins for beeing in fashion or killing fur seals for nonsense, etc...i wouldn't call them traditions but come from so called first world countries...

there might be a japanese, spanish or u.s./canadian person that will tell me that it is normal even though i'll never understand it likewise you don't understand why guinea pigs are eaten in some countries.

Finally when i mentioned "inka" I used the quechua word...Take a look at this:

http://www.quechuanetwork.org/dictionary.cfm?lang=e

see ya

11:03 AM, August 21, 2006

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

some animals are just too cute to be eaten!! (dogs, cats, dolphins) especially little guinea pigs! I will never tell my guinea pig Hippo about this. he would be terrified of leaving his Pigloo...

4:41 PM, March 14, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

u bastard .....i used 2 have this pet at home.it was 1000000 times more wise than u... i think it is sick to eat pets....really....mentally sick people do something like this....better thing is only to eat a brain of ALIVE monkey.....some bastards do like this u can try.....it is my advice for amateurs of guinea pig......u just try. and let me know how it was.i am waiting. with regards< SAINI

9:49 AM, May 05, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You stupid fuckheads, they are harmless guinea pigs, they didn`t cook you! I hope you meet some cannibals, and they cook you the same way. You tortured them, de-hairing them, skinning them, and killing them! Rot in hell, fuckers!

5:16 PM, May 28, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

that is just sick!!!!how can you do this!! I really hope someone is going to de-hair you, skin you and kill you the same way!!!!!

12:24 PM, June 17, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yummy???that pretty little pet is yummy??? I really hope you will be eaten with all of your museum!!!and then I hope people will say you were yummy!!!which I doubt!!

12:26 PM, June 17, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sure if you were all stranded and starving in the Andes you'd probably eat a guinea pig too. The tradition of eating guinea pigs developed as a survival strategy long before the advent of supermarkets and Tofurkey. The truth is, every culture at one point depended on one meat source or another for survival, and whether or not you think this is ethical, it's important to realize that if they didn't you probably wouldn't be here today. The only difference between modern day Peruvians and you "civilized people" is that they don't write of their ancestors practices as barbaric and revolting. Think what you want about meat, but don't attack others for their traditions. I'm sure if you were given the choice between feeding your children a guinea pig or watching them die of starvation you'd probably feed them the damn thing. If not, there is something biologically wrong with you.

9:08 PM, December 02, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope to bring some light on the matter. The "cuyes", wich is how the incas named this little rodent where and still been an important part of the diet of the people of the andean region. They do not keep them as pets, they breed them as we do with chicken or cows, or rabbits, they cousins. They reproduce really fast ( a female can have up to 30 baby "cuyes" per year). the ones you get here as pets are the little ones, there are some breeds than can weight 8 pounds and above. It was and still been an important supply of protein for the inca people.
So please don't judge this as "gross", it's just that way it is. And the way the inca cooked it more frequently was simmered in peanuts sauce, not fried, Peanuts are native to Peru, where they are called "maní" a quechua word. from Peru they were taken to Mexico in precolumbian time where they were callec "cacahuatl".
Also, as the the "incas" didn't have a written language, it was up to the "conquistadores" to write the sounds of the "quechua" using the spanish language, so "inca" is written using the spanish sounds, and "inka" is how an english speaking person will write it.Also as the spanish language evolved, so it did the way the qhechua was spelled, like the capital of the inca empire is spelled in so many ways: Cuzco, Cusco, Qusco, Qosqo, because, all are an aproximation to the sound of an quechua speaking person. I personally think that Qosqo reflects more closely the sound of a native quechua speaking person (yes i've been to Peru for many years).

4:22 AM, February 10, 2008

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

U R SICK MINDED PEOPLE!! i have a guinea pig, and if my little scooter found out bout you, you would be in big trouble!!! HOW DOU EAT, POOR INICENT CREATURES. (they are not bitey and mean either) i love guinea pigs, and you will NEVER get mine!! you sick stupid gienea pig eaters!!!

11:03 PM, May 09, 2008

 
Anonymous Michelle said...

I'm scared by the anger of these people... do you really have that much hatred or are you just a little too expressive with your words?

Do you really hate people because they eat something you think is cute?

well boss did it
ever strike you that a
hen regrets it just as
much when they wring her
neck as an oriole but
nobody has any
sympathy for a hen because
she is not beautiful
while every one gets
sentimental over the
oriole and says how
shocking to kill the
lovely thing this thought
comes to my mind
because of the earnest
endeavor of a
gentleman to squash me
yesterday afternoon when i
was riding up in the
elevator if i had been a
butterfly he would have
said how did that
beautiful thing happen to
find its way into
these grimy city streets do
not harm the splendid
creature but let it
fly back to its rural
haunts again beauty always
gets the best of
it be beautiful boss
a thing of beauty is a
joy forever
be handsome boss
and let who will be clever is
the sad advice
of your ugly little friend
archy

11:14 AM, August 14, 2008

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you are the most awfal woman in the world! How would you like if sombody cooked you? Huh?

9:02 PM, September 26, 2008

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN AND LOVED ONES WILL END LIKE THAT! YOU WILL FRY IN HELL ALSO!!!

9:27 AM, November 06, 2008

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Apparently some people have no resemblance of a heart, soul, or anything in between.

9:19 PM, January 10, 2009

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Alright..look. YOU guys think guinea pigs are pets..and a cow, or a chicken are just as harmless as a guinea pig. have they ever done anything to you? No. so don't say we're killing innocent animals when all animals are innocent and yet there is still mass slaughtering and mistreatment of some of the other animals and i dont see anything being done about that... like Gonzalo said, this is a traditional dish so you people with your pet guinea pigs need to calm down because you obviously don't understand and never will understand why we eat guinea pigs. if you don't find it appropriate then thats great for you, but leave the people who do alone!

5:10 PM, January 29, 2009

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

C'mon, i bet half of u eat cows a home. They are nice animals. You tatless assholes need to gain some culture

SHEESH!

5:27 PM, March 26, 2009

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Every bases their opinion on their cultural background. How about if you had been raised with a chicken as your pet, or a cow, or pig? Don't you think you would be the same way about eating them. First of all, if you haven't tasted guinea pig, you can't say it tastes gross or that you need to be drunk in order to enjoy it. The fact is that eating guinea pig is a tradition in Peru, and peruvians consider eating guinea pig as a delicacy. First, you need to know in order to be able to speak out your mind.

2:56 PM, November 07, 2009

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who knows where to download XRumer 5.0 Palladium?
Help, please. All recommend this program to effectively advertise on the Internet, this is the best program!

12:23 PM, November 14, 2009

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Quite interesting but gross! (Maybe I should try that to my guinea pig! jk jk jk!)

8:47 AM, November 16, 2009

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

the Cuy was considered food long before it was a pet in other countries. The cow is considered as sacred by y the Hindu. I tried Cuy several times before I found one that was palatable, it is rather like squirrel.

if you are visiting Ecuador and want to try something original the Guanta (Cuniculus paca) it's somomwhat like goat,

10:50 PM, February 17, 2010

 
Blogger tck101 said...

"Fried Guinea Pig"

... it seems like an interesting dish...which apparently (LIKE ALL ODD FOODS) seems to taste like Chicken.

HOWEVER, all you in your right state of mind (Mainly this is directed at westerners who have the concept that eating pets is wrong)should probably not eat this adorable furball...

However if eating G. pigs is a part of your culture, then...i guess as a (PRO PET person) then you have the right, but i still dont agree with you...

Bon Apetiet

9:11 AM, October 23, 2011

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Top ten livestock animals killed for food worldwide per year
Data is from 2009. The list is based on data provided by National Geographic Magazine in May, 2011.

# killed Animal
52,000,000,000 Chicken
2,600,000,000 Duck
1,300,000,000 Pig
1,100,000,000 Rabbit
633,000,000 Turkey
518,000,000 Sheep
398,000,000 Goat
293,000,000 Cow
65,000,000 Guinea Pig
24,000,000 Water Buffalo

7:02 PM, April 18, 2012

 
Anonymous Jeff said...

I would eat a guinea pigs face. I would eat a dolphins face too. You all need to calm down. You can't eat a cow or a pig and then say that eating a "pet" is wrong. I had a cow as a pet growing up... than we ate it. It tasted just like non-pet cows. I like how people make such stupid comments when its anonymous.

11:19 AM, May 16, 2012

 
Blogger Оксана Прокофьева said...

Write nonsense.
People are carnivores and should eat meat. No offers have a furry friend. There is nothing there. To grow more food guinea pigs, meat. Just eat and horses. Believe me. Meat of horses is very tasty. I ate. I treated a resident of Kazakhstan (country in Russia). Yes. The people of Kazakhstan are eating horses and no one is surprised. Most of the cows eat. But in India the cow is considered sacred animals. In each country, eat different animals.
Most resent those who have never had to live in the countryside. Those who shop next door, and there lies the meat pieces have. So behave children)))))))))))) And all my life, they are kids! The old, wrinkled children.

3:19 AM, July 24, 2012

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

YOU HAVE TO DIE FOR THIS, ALL OF YOU. YOU ARE WORST OF A BEAST. WORST.

7:58 AM, October 23, 2012

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

GONZALO, there are traditions and traditions!!! So different a skirt to kill and eat a poor animal!!!

7:59 AM, October 23, 2012

 
Anonymous cavy guy said...

are the people who have a pet guiea pig aware they are social animals, and that it is cruel to keep them by themselves, and please explain how the G.P.s are tortured?
they are a valuable resourse, and are tresured, and apreciated all the more when eaten.
they are very very efficient converters of food to meat, and this makes them very valuable to the poor sustinance farmers who rely on them for protein so their families dont die from malnutrition
I had a pet lamb, i bottle fed it, then killed and ate it, it was yum.

OK, so let me get this straight,so gp is off the menue as its cruel to eat but "OK" meat ie feedlot beef, sow stall pork or cage chicken is fine?
what ever

10:12 PM, October 28, 2012

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the people who are poting comments and are upset by theis idea, If you are not ok with eating animals you consider pets why visit this site, using abusive language to try and get your point across is third grade mentality. Lets start with facts, Millions of people in the world eat meat, it is why our teeth are shaped the way they are. Guinea pigs have been a tradional food in south america in for thousands of years, your berating those who are pointing out that Guinea pigs are a food source is pointless, it wont stop people from eating these animals. In South American Guinea Pigs roam around in a hut without a cage at all, and they live great lives, Their owners honor them during their lives and use every part of them for food. Current methods in developed countries of slaughtering animals is fast and productive, but it does not honor the animal. So if you are a vegetarian, it is probably best you visit another site, and if you do eat meat, ask yourself how was the animal treated, what was it fed and how was it honored before being packaged up and sold to you in a store....something to think about.

7:40 PM, December 05, 2012

 
Anonymous Boss said...

Anonymous babies are also considered meat why don't you send me your address so i can cook your kids see how you feel maybe you'll change your mind after all it was a tradition in South Asia for years. Sick bastards. Why are some races so f**cking cruel

2:08 PM, March 28, 2013

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, talk about over-reacting big time, people. Some of the posts in this thread are over-the-top crazy. Nobody is saying anybody SHOULD eat the things, the blog post is just reporting on a gross recipe that already exists in the world. If you can't keep your head and stay civilized when somebody points out something that already exists in the world, that's pretty pathetic.

6:40 PM, April 16, 2013

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am a vegetarian. I also love Guinea pigs. But guys get over it, I find eating all meat disgusting, but imagine this: 'sitting in the boiling hot sun with your dying baby girl, there's no water and no food. You see a colony of guinea pigs- helpless creatures who have some water to drink.' What would you do? Kill the innocent creatures or let YOUR innocent baby die of hunger. The thing that I feel is ridiculous is that people think it is okay to kill and eat other animals and still say that killing and eating guinea pigs is wrong.
So yeah, I get why people are getting protective over these creatures. But stop and think before you say stuff like that. You are obviously in a privileged position- you don't have to hunt to survive and are not faced with the death of family members every day, and don't say that you are because you own a device that can connect to the internet.
I also agree with the cultural thing as well- in Scotland it is haggis, in Peru it is guinea pigs. Don't be ignorant it will cost you your life.

3:22 PM, May 29, 2013

 

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